Man up

“Man up!”
This is intended to be a short post with not a lot of intensity but more just a personal reflection on a phrase that is tossed around a lot today in Christian circles.

“Grow a pair! Man up!” These phrases I think have been brought into otherwise gospel centered conversations not to detract from the gospel but to, I think, encourage in the gospel. However, the message contained in those words seem not only false, but anti-gospel. I don’t judge the user of those words, for I am sure that more often than not the intention is a gospel centered desire but, like many of our ideas, fall short of the glory of the gospel.

So what do those words mean? Not literally, nobody means them literally, as if the man you are speaking to is void of a “pair” and somehow needs to muster up the biological capacity to start growing a “pair.” What is conveyed in those words is the thought that we need to muster up something in ourselves, a strength, an attitude, an energy, and then get on with what needs to be done. It is similar to “pull yourself up by the bootstraps,” or as somebody said recently, it is the little engine that could theology.

No doubt, men need to be men. There is no denying that. Our culture is failing miserably in this arena of life. Boys stay boys forever, dependent upon mom and dad, cowardly, afraid and completely void of any real masculinity. However, this is not the only area in life where men are failing. We were created to be many things, one of which is men, but also to be images of God, worshippers of God. We fail here to. Its called sin. But nobody’s answer to the sin of failing to be God’s image bearer is to try harder. And the answer to being a man is not to try harder either.

It would be great if we had the strength to overcome our sin and weakness and fears and to perfectly fulfill all our God given roles, but we can’t. Sin dominates us in every area of our life and in ourselves we do not have the ability to correct or stay sin. Sin is our master, we are not sin’s master.

The problem is this: in telling men to be men we are telling them to do the impossible. The very first thing Adam did after he sinned that very first sin was to forgo his manhood. He cast off his role and placed the weight of responsibility on his wife. The answer for Adam was not grow “a pair.” The answer was repent.

If you want to crush men striving in and for the gospel, tell them to “man up.” Tell them that they are failing and that the problem is there lack of manhood. Tell them that if they were men they would fight better and harder and longer, that their “pair” is to little and that is why they struggle.

I have never been told to “man up” by another man. I cannot imagine what that would feel like. I know that my response would be to try a whole lot harder. To really reach down into the depths of me and try. But how void of the gospel is this.

The gospel message tells me that I have failed in and of myself in ever area of my life. But instead of calling me to “man up” it calls me to lay it all down. It calls me not to look at anything I have or can do or have done but to look at the Man. It calls me to cast all my hope for life in Christ in repentance and faith. The gospel says to me, in every failing and sin, you are accepted on behalf of Christ, not your “pair.”

The gospel calls me to repentance in all of my life and then to faith in all of life. It calls me to death of self. The gospel tells me all power rests in God and that no matter how big or small my “pair” may be the growth is up to God. In Jesus no labor is in vain. In abiding in Christ I will bear much fruit.

So, I don’t say any of this as a strong rebuke to those that so love the expression, “man up,” but I do say be careful. The theology you may be instilling in people through trite and cliché expressions may drive them from the gospel, not to the gospel.

Remember, the gospel is the power of God unto salvation. Salvation in all its parts: election, calling, sanctification, glorification, etc is the work of God, start to finish. Man up, grow a pair, try harder, work longer, do more, etc, fail the gospel because they look to man and self. The gospel always directs our eyes away from self, (not only our pride but also our humiliation,) and to Jesus.